I’ve said before that balance is key. I’ve also said that my book is my number one priority in my life, which is perhaps why I’ve been struggling so hard with school this semester. Maybe my struggle was because this was my first semester at University. Writing and going to school has never been much of a problem before, and I was easily able to balance it while getting my dual AAs, but suddenly it’s a problem. Whatever the reason, this semester had proven so difficult and I came considerably close to dropping out.
I was worried about my grades, group projects, essays, individual projects, exams, finals, and oh the horror of it all! Not to mention, I was still struggling to keep up my blog posts, and staying on schedule with my books. It was the most stressful time of my life, which left me wondering: is all the stress worth it?
Many scenarios played through my head: Should I just quit right this second? Should I take time off? Should I take an academic LOA? Should I just drop out and use the money for traveling and finding myself? (The last one was immensely compelling).
I was sooo overwhelmed! In Junior College I got nothing but As and Bs, but here I honestly had no idea what my grades were going to look like, even though I was giving my 100%, and I didn’t think that it would be worth my time or money to keep going back if I was just going to fail classes. BUT, instead of doing anything rash, I decided to take a breather, suck it up, and finish the semester.
And I’m so thankful I did. All of this paid off and my grades prove it. I got 2 As and 2 Bs :3 Pretty dern good, if I say so myself. I was honestly surprised I got an A in one of the classes I was most worried about actually; I honestly thought I was going to fail, but I guess all the stress was just making me the crazy lady.
I had to remind myself the reason for going to school in the first place and the sole reason being I wanted to better my writing. I want to be the best possible writer that I can be. Sure, there are cheaper ways, really, to be a writer, but I just wanted what was best for myself and I thought that was getting a degree in Creative Writing. I want that degree, darn it, and I’m not stopping until I get it. I’ve been in school far too long now to just quit.
Now that I got those complicated classes out of the way, I feel like my experience at University will be a lot smoother. I’m even a little motivated to go for my MFA, and if I did, it would definitely be at a University in London (there’s no changin’ my mind! It’s already made up :p). I’m not much of a quitter anyhow, if you haven’t noticed ;p I think it’s important to realize that even when crap hits the fan, it’s good to take a moment to step back and breathe. Give your logic a minute to start working again, and then use it with your gut to pull through. Things always have a way of working out :)